Straight Outta Camelot
by You're The Doctor Harry
Summary: Arthur has finally returned to the living after being dead for thousands of years. Has Merlin kept his promise to never change? What has Merlin been up to in those thousands of years? Can they face the 21st century together? *rating may change* *Doctor Who is also in here*
1. Chapter 1

(A/N: Hi guys! So I've started my Merlin fic. I'm sorry I haven't updated my minewt fic, but I've been really busy and I'm having writers block for that story. I changed my username because I thought it might be best for a writer to have a grammatically correct username haha. I hope to update at least once more this week and it will probably happen because it's a billion degrees out and I don't have air conditioning in my house, but the library does have ac. I had to rewatch the ending to write this so I hope you like it. Reviews make my day!)

 _ **EVERYTHING BELONGS TO BBC AND SHINE I OWN NOTHING!**_

/

" _No man, no matter how great, can control his destiny_."

Merlin had heard Kilgharrah speak those words twice now. The first time was on his way to Camelot he thought he heard someone say it. He didn't realize that it was The Great Dragon who had said it until he heard it a second time when Arthur was dying. He thought he had known his destiny, but once Arthur died, he didn't know anymore. Nobody, not even Kilgharrah, realized that his destiny was not supposed to happen in the 9th century, but in the 21st century. However, Merlin had to live the 1500 years in between the two time periods.

After Arthur's death, Merlin returned to live with Gaius. He tried to spend time with Percival, because Percival was devastated over Gwaine's death. Percival and Gwaine had been together, just like Merlin and Arthur had. However, after Gaius died about five years after Arthur, the memories of Camelot became too much and he left to go back to Ealdor and live with his mother. He stayed there for about 15 more years, during which he realized that he wasn't aging. His mother helped him get over Arthur's death, but she eventually became old and passed away. Merlin was devastated over his mother's death, so he left Ealdor to use magic and build a little cottage near Avalon.

Throughout the years, Merlin witnessed many things. He realized that he could not die, and he didn't age. The only way he could look his age was if he used a spell. He still wasn't happy, but he was willing to go through everything if it meant seeing Arthur again. He saw Camelot fall when William the Conqueror took over the United Kingdom in 1066. He witnessed magic wands come to be popular, and he helped with the building of Hogwarts when he was about 200 years old. He became good friends with Salazar Slytherin, although he didn't agree with his pure blooded status. Merlin became the first person sorted into the Slytherin house and saw magic form a government. He decided that he would start the Order of Merlin, where he would pick a witch or wizard who he found outstanding, and give them a reward.

Merlin did not just stay in the wizarding world. Muggles always reminded him of his time in Camelot, so he stayed with the muggles. While out of the wizarding world, he meat Rory Williams, who had been waiting for his wife, Amy, to wake up for a good 400 years before Merlin was even born. Rory helped keep Merlin out of trouble and away from drugs. Rory became Merlin's first friend since losing Camelot.

Rory introduced Merlin to the Eleventh Doctor about 100 years after they met, but Merlin met the Ninth Doctor a few years later, and realized that Nine was the easiest for him to get along with. He was friends all regenerations with the Doctor, and the Doctor would come visit him every so often throughout history.

Merlin met Captain Jack Harkness in a tavern one evening. Jack had flirted with him and bought him drinks. Neither of them mentioned that they were immortal, so they continued on with their lives. Every couple of centuries, they would find each other again. After meeting 5 times over a span of 400 years and neither of them looking any different, they realized both were immortal and spent more time together.

In the 15th century, Merlin strayed away from muggles completely. Muggles had become fearful of magic, and had started to burn anyone suspected of sorcery. It was like Uther's rule all over again,except this time there was no Once and Future Prince to protect. He left England and moved to France. Without any of his immortal friends to keep him sane, he fell into drugs and alcohol. He didn't know how to deal with the pain of losing everything and the human brain is not supposed to have memories of almost a thousand years. He began spiraling down into a pit of insanity that he never fully recovered from.

Thankfully, the French Ministry of Magic found him and decided to bring him to Beauxbatons School of Magic to help get some structure and sanity back into his life. While he was there, he met Nicholas and Perenelle Flamel. They were alchemists, who were trying to create the Philosopher's Stone. At first he was angry with them and tried to convince them that immortality was the worst thing that could happen to a person, but they did not listen. They decided to become immortal to help get Merlin back onto his feet and prepare for Arthur's return. The nightmares and insanity never fully went away, but Nicholas and Perenelle convinced him to use the knowledge Gaius had given him and become a physician, which helped. Eventually the three of them moved back to Merlin's cottage by Avalon and with the help of the Flamels and the Philosopher's Stone, they opened Albion Hospital.

Merlin watched oceans rise and empires fall (Hamilton anyone?). He saw crusades and world wars and people be downright horrible to each other, yet still Arthur did not return. In 1991, Harry Potter destroyed the Philosopher's Stone. Merlin wanted to be angry at Harry Potter for destroying Nicholas and Perenelle's immortality, but how could he when Harry was just an eleven year old trying to stop the man who had killed his parents? When he asked Nicholas what they would do, Nicholas said that their immortality would no longer be needed, as Arthur was soon to return. Merlin had no idea how this was true, but he dared, if even slightly, to hope it was true. A few years later, he fought alongside Harry Potter in the Battle of Hogwarts. Harry found out that Merlin was actually alive and responded with "Merlin's pants!" which caused Merlin to laugh harder than he had in centuries.

One day, Merlin was working in the hospital when he heard a voice that he hadn't heard since the day Arthur died. " _Take heed, for when Albion's need is greatest, Arthur will rise again._ "

It had been one of the last things Kilgharrah had said to him. He felt magic swirling around him. He knew. For the first time in centuries, he was sure of one thing. Arthur had returned.

(A/N: So this is the start! Please let me know what you think! I'm hoping to update soon but no promises, sadly. Thanks for reading!)


	2. Arthur Returns

(A/N: Hey guys! Here's chapter 2; I hope you like it. I'm hoping to write a whole bunch of chapters and update whenever possible. For my minewt fic, I'm still having writer's block but I have some ideas to keep it moving. Enjoy, and reviews are always welcome!)

 _ **MY NAME IS NOT BBC OR SHINE SO THEREFORE I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING AND I AM MAKING NO MONEY OFF OF THIS WHATSOEVER.**_

/

One moment, Arthur was sleeping, the next, he was drowning. Where was he? What had happened? The last thing he remembered was Merlin holding him as he died in his arms. Did he really die? How long ago was he in his lover's arms? He thought he better not contemplate it too much or he would drown. Why was he surrounded by water anyway? He had so many questions.

He decided that his best option was to swim upwards and hope that he would break the surface before he ran out of air. Thankfully, after only swimming upwards for a little while, he reached the top. As he shook the water out of his hair, he decided to take a look around and try to figure out where he was. Nothing looked familiar. There was a black strip of dirt on the ground where something he had never seen before whizzed past at an alarming speed. Suddenly, a person dressed in very strange attire stepped out of one of the things and started yelling in a different language. He recognised a couple of words, but not enough that he could understand what the man was saying. The man started motioning for him to come out of the water, so he swam to shore. He thought this man must be some foreign knight, so as he exited the water he pulled out his sword. The man gave him a funny look, and started talking in a sterner tone. Arthur began telling this man that he was the king of Camelot, and he would not be spoken to in that way, but the man did not seem to understand him, either. The man grabbed his arm and dragged him into the giant thing. Inside, there were what looked like very comfortable chairs, surrounded by strange lights and a circular thing in front of one of the chairs. Suddenly, the thing lurched forward. Arthur wasn't used to the speed or lurching sensation, and he started to feel nauseous.

A few minutes into the ride in what Arthur presumed was a horseless carriage, the motion sickness took over and he vomited onto the seat in front of him. This seemed to upset the man who was leading the carriage, who pulled out a little black box with numbers and a pointy end. The man must have realized that Arthur could not understand what he was saying, and demonstrated blowing into the pointy end. He handed the box to Arthur who repeated it. The man took the box back, looked at the numbers, and shrugged. Then he stopped paying attention to Arthur and turned around.

Arthur was still very confused about where he was, so he started trying to ask questions. Thankfully, the man seemed friendly enough and Arthur was fairly confident that he would not be attacked. However, he did not put his sword away, just in case. He began spouting off names of people he knew, such as his knights, Merlin, his father, or Guinevere. The man seemed to know what he was talking about, because he chuckled and said something. Suddenly, the horseless carriage pulled up next to a very unfriendly looking palace. The man got out and dragged Arthur with him. He was lead to a throne where he could tell the woman, dressed in a man's clothing, began to ask him questions. He was hoping that she might be able to find Merlin for him, so he began spitting off any name that had to do with Merlin. He tried Merlin, he tried Dragoon, and he even tried Emrys. The lady pulled up a big box, and showed a perfect likeness of Merlin to him. At that point, Arthur got very excited, so he pointed and smiled and said "yes" over and over again. He was going to be reunited with Merlin!

Meanwhile, in Albion Hospital, Merlin heard a voice. It was a voice he had not heard in thousands of years, saying words he had not heard since the time Arthur was alive. " _Take heed, for when Albion's need is greatest, Arthur will rise again."_ Merlin was finally certain of one thing. Arthur had returned. Arthur had come back to him.

Unfortunately, his boss did not realize it. And how could he just ask his boss for some time off and say, "Oh yeah, my medieval boyfriend just raised from the dead after a thousand years, can I have some time off to go snog him senseless and save the world from likely impending doom?" That would not work. And of course, he happened to be with a patient when Kilgharrah spoke. He willed his magic not to flair up and finished the appointment as quickly as possible. As he was finishing it, he felt his phone buzz in his pocket. After he gave a vaccine to a very unhappy four year old and finished the appointment, he used his magic to give himself a fever so he could leave and try to find Arthur. As he left, he took the fever spell off of himself and checked his phone. There was one call, and it was from the police. "Dammit," he muttered as he listened to the voicemail that they left.

"Hello, Mr. Emrys. This is the Avalon police chief, Miranda LeFay. There is a man here dressed as a medieval soldier complete with a sword, and he is speaking a language that we cannot seem to identify. He keeps saying your name, so we think you might be able to help us. He was found swimming in Avalon Lake, which is illegal, so you will have to pay a small bail. Please call us back if you have any information on this man, Thank you."

Of course, the police had to find Arthur before he could. The police would probably have a lot of questions, but right now he was focused on getting Arthur back. When the police told him that Arthur wasn't speaking English, he realized just how much the language had changed in all of the years he had waited. Arthur was speaking English, but it was now known as Olde English. He called the police and told them that he would come and pay Arthur's bail, and then called the Ninth Doctor. When he called The Doctor, he asked, "So Doctor, would you like to see the rise of The Once and Future King?"

He could almost hear The Doctor's excitement at seeing King Arthur Pendragon return. The Doctor said he would land the TARDIS outside the police station when Merlin picked him up. Merlin pulled into the police station, and took a deep breath in anticipation.

He pulled the heavy door to the police station and entered the room where they kept prisoners waiting for bail. He closed his eyes as he pushed the door open. He was planning to speak to the chief and pay the bail before seeing Arthur, but when he opened his eyes and saw the Once and Future King sitting in a police station chair, all of his thoughts disappeared.

Arthur looked up as he heard the door open, and whispered, "Merlin." Merlin's eyes teared up and he whispered, "Arthur." The two medieval men ran at each other, and suddenly they were kissing. The police chief smiled and looked away politely, but they were too wrapped up in each other to notice. Merlin was crying, and when they broke away for air, and whispered through his tears, "You're back," before connecting their lips again. Merlin's hands were buried in Arthur's hair, and Arthur's hands were cupping Merlin's face. "I missed you so much," Merlin whispered in between kisses. When Arthur broke away to start kissing Merlin's neck, the police chief decided that she was too busy to watch them for much longer and cleared her throat, causing the ancient couple to break apart, but not stop holding each other.

Merlin paid the bail and put a spell on the woman so she would forget all about them and Arthur would not have a criminal record. "Merlin, what's going on?" Arthur asked Merlin, still speaking in Olde English. "I have no idea," Merlin said as the couple walked out of the door, Merlin's arm around Arthur's waist. "I'm just glad you're back."

They stopped walking, and Arthur nuzzled Merlin's face before kissing him again. This time, with no one there to watch them, they let their hands wander a bit. Merlin's hands slipped under Arthur's chainmail as their tongues battled for dominance. Arthur tasted the same as he had all those centuries ago, like wine and the feast that he had eaten the night before the battle. Arthur attempted to slip a hand under the hoodie Merlin had thrown over his scrubs, but it got caught in the pocket. They broke apart and giggled. Merlin's emotions took over again, and he started crying. "Merlin, what happened? How long was I gone for?"

This caused Merlin to cry even harder, so Arthur pulled him into a hug and kissed his hair. "Arthur, you died. 1500 years ago. It's 2012 now. So much has happened in all of that time, and now you're finally back. The only bad thing about that is the dragon said that you would return when Albion's need is greatest. I've seen revolutions, empires falling, new continents being found, and even world wars, yet you still did not return. Why didn't Albion need you then, why now?"

Arthur pulled his face out of Merlin's hair, his eyes widening. "Camlaan only feels like a few hours ago. Has it really been 1500 years?" At Merlin's nod, he continued. "So I died, and you waited all of this time for me? You haven't died and raised from the dead or anything? Why did you do it?"

"Arthur, you're the Once and Future King, I knew you would return someday. I would wait 1500 more years for you. You're worth it," Merlin responded. Arthur leaned in and kissed Merlin again. "I left you alone for so long," he whispered, his eyes tearing up.

They walked out into the parking lot and saw the Ninth Doctor standing with his TARDIS. The Doctor's face lit up when he saw Arthur. "You must be Arthur Pendragon!" he exclaimed. "Pleasure to meet you. I'm The Doctor!"

He held out his hand, which Arthur shook. "The Doctor is one of my friends," Merlin explained. He's only a few centuries younger than me; he's only 900." Arthur's eyes widened. "Only 900? You really are old, Merlin, to think that's young." Merlin nodded. "The Doctor is an alien from another planet, although most people don't realize that there are aliens yet. I met him because he just kept popping up throughout history, and when you are as old as we are, you eventually run into each other. We're going to be taking his TARDIS back to my cottage because from what I heard, you got motion sickness from the car and they had to give you a breathalyzer test to make sure you weren't drunk."

"What's a breaedfrasdzer?" Arthur asked.

"A breathalyzer, Arthur. 21st century technology. It was to see if you were drunk, and if so, just how pissed you were. That thing you rode in to get here, that's called a car. We use them instead of horses now. God, you don't know a thing about 21st century technology, do you? This will take a ton of explaining. Right now, were going in a time machine that will transport us directly to my house and will make you learn modern English. Oh, and by the way, don't mention The Doctor or the TARDIS to anyone else, it's not a very known thing yet, and we would like to keep it that way, yeah?" Merlin explained.

Arthur simply nodded, unable to take everything in just yet. The three of them stepped into the TARDIS and with whooshing sounds, they materialized into thin air.

/

(Hey guys, I finally updated! If you got confused as to why this takes place 4 years ago, it will be explained later in the story. I'm going to be around more since school is coming up, so hopefully I will be able to update soon! Thanks to all of the lovely reviews!)


	3. Chapter 3

(A/N: Hey guys,I haven't updated in forever and I'm really sorry. I will warn you, there is an implied sex scene in this, but not actually a sex scene. I'm way too awkward to actually write one, but I'm implying it, so if you don't like that, just don't read it. I'm not changing the rating yet, since this is just an implication. Hope you enjoy, and your reviews make my day!)

/

The whooshing of the TARDIS stopped, and The Doctor opened the door. Outside, Arthur got his first glimpse of Merlin's little cottage. "This is where I live," Merlin told Arthur, and interlaced their fingers. Arthur blushed, since when they were in Camelot they tried to keep their relationship as secretive as possible. They would usually keep all kissing behind closed doors, and Arthur assumed that their kiss in the police station was just because Merlin had not seen him in 1500 years. In Camelot, if they had shown any affection, Merlin would have been executed.

They walked hand in hand to Merlin's cottage and waved to The Doctor as he left. As soon as they got inside, Merlin threw his arms around Arthur and began kissing him. Arthur was surprised at first, but once he realized what was going on, he began kissing back. Merlin's tongue pressed into Arthur's mouth, and Arthur's fingers were in his hair, feeling the course locks for the first time in thousands of years. Merlin was clinging to Arthur like his life depended on it. Arthur pulled back when he felt Merlin's tears on his cheek. "I left you alone for so long," he whispered into the dark hair. "It's, ok, I promise," Merlin whispered back, pulling Arthur's mouth back onto his. "I would do it over again in a second. You're worth it."

They continued their heated kissing, backing into the cottage. Merlin pushed Arthur back towards the couch, shedding their clothes as they got closer. He then pushed Arthur down onto the couch, and Arthur pulled him down with him. "I have to get closer to you," Merlin whispered in Arthur's mouth as they shed the rest of their clothes. After a bit more of heated kissing, Arthur muttered, "I assume this hasn't changed in 1500 years?" When Merlin shook his head no, the two lovers let pleasure overtake them.

After Merlin got his wish, the two were snuggling on the couch. Merlin's head was on Arthur's chest and Arthur's hand was running through Merlin's soft, thick hair. They were quiet, just enjoying each other's company for the first time in over a millennia, when suddenly they heard a strange gurgling sound. Merlin looked at Arthur funny, and Arthur muttered, "Some of us haven't eaten in 1500 years, clotpole." Merlin rolled his eyes. "My word," he whispered back. "Why are we whispering?" Arthur asked. "I really don't know," Merlin answered. They began giggling; Merlin's sharp cheekbones were in Arthur's hands as they stared into the other's eyes. Then Arthur's stomach growled again. "Food," Merlin said, and Arthur nodded.

After kissing for a bit again, they reluctantly climbed off of the couch and began putting their clothes back on. Arthur reached for his tunic and chainmail, when Merlin told him, "You can't wear that anymore. People will look at you funny." Arthur was confused. "Merlin, these are clothes fit for a king," he responded. "Yeah, a long time ago. I'll let you borrow some of my clothes for now until we can get to the store and get you some of your own," Merlin told him.

They walked back into Merlin's bedroom hand in hand. Merlin flipped the lightswitch and light flooded the small, previously dark room. "What was that?" Arthur asked. "Was it sorcery?" Merlin shook his head. "Muggles use electricity now. It powers a lot of stuff, I'll show you once you're dressed." Arthur was still staring at the light fixture transfixed. "What's a muggle?" he asked.

Merlin had forgotten that back in Arthur's time, magic had only been a religion. There was no Ministry of Magic, or Hogwarts, or wands or broomsticks. "It's what magical people call non magic people. You're like, half muggle, I guess. You don't have magic, but you were born because of it, and you were able to come back from the dead. No magic can raise the dead anymore, Arthur. The Dragon, Killighara, told me that the Druids had a prophecy about you and me. You would return when Albion's need was greatest, and I was meant to wait for you," Merlin explained to him.

"So the prophecy came true then?" he asked, reaching up towards a lightbulb. "Don't touch that, Arthur, you'll get burned," he said, reaching around him and gently tugging his arm back down. "But yes, I suppose this does mean the prophecy has come true." Arthur turned around, facing Merlin. "So that means Albion is in danger, since now Albion's need is greatest right? I have to protect my people!" He exclaimed. "Sire, I've seen world wars, I've seen horrors most people can hardly imagine so I can't say why you've come back now. But before we find out what Albion's need is greatest, I think you need to get dressed and understanding 21st century technology." When Arthur stomach growled yet again, Merlin continued, "And fed."

Merlin went into his closet and pulled out all of the clothes he thought would fit Arthur. He laid them out on the floor and on the bed based on how fancy they were. "These are t shirts," he explained. "They're certainly the most comfortable, although they aren't really kingly attire." He pulled out a polo shirt and explained, "These are called polo shirts. They are pretty comfortable, and are a bit nicer than a t shirt, so you might like them better, _your majesty."_ He pulled out some different pairs of trousers and pointing to the jeans explained," These are usually worn with t shirts, however they are less comfortable than these." He pointed to the sweatpants. Then he pointed to the dressier trousers. "These you would probably wear these with those," he said, indicating the polo shirts. "If you get a job, you would probably wear these with a fancier shirt that I don't have because I don't have an office job." Arthur just looked at him confused, so Merlin showed him the hoodies.

Merlin was wearing his most comfortable clothes after changing out of his scrubs before picking Arthur up from the police station. He had on grey sweatpants, an old t shirt from when he played quidditch for the Slytherin team in the early 2000s, and a navy blue hoodie. Arthur, who seemed pretty nervous about picking out clothes for the 21st century, opted for clothes that looked similar to Merlin's. He grabbed a pair of sweatpants, a t shirt and a hoodie, so he was basically wearing the same thing as Merlin. As he began pulling the new clothes on, Merlin exclaimed, "Wait!" and pulled out a clean pair of boxers from his closet. Arthur understood what they were, and put the new 21st century clothes on. "We should have had the tailor in Camelot make us something like these. They are much more comfortable than chainmail was." He said once he was dressed. "I don't know, sire, they wouldn't do much against a sword," Merlin responded.

Once they were both dressed, Merlin kissed Arthur's cheek and wrapped his arms against his muscled shoulders. He lead him out of the bedroom and back to the couch, where he sat Arthur down. Then he pulled out his mobile, and said, "I'm going to introduce you this wonderful thing invented around 200 years ago by the Italians." Arthur stared at the mobile cautiously. "Is that thing the Italian?" he asked.

Merlin burst out laughing and kissed Arthur's cheek for probably the millionth time since he returned a few hours ago. "No, babe, this isn't the Italians. This is my mobile. This wasn't even thought of 200 years ago, it's a very recent invention. God, sometimes I forget how little of the world was known back then. The Italians were really great people who make really incredible food. Tonight, I'm going to introduce you to one of their inventions: pizza."

Arthur nodded, pretending to understand a word of what Merlin said. He did something with that thing he called a "mobile". It lit up, and Arthur immediately grew weary of it, assuming it was more sorcery. He then remembered that Merlin was a sorcerer, so there must be tons of sorcery in this house. He remembered beginning to trust Merlin again after his betrayal closer to the time of his death, but his father's teaching of the evils of magic, losing both of his parents to it and it turning the closest person to him into a cruel and terrible person, he was still a bit wary of it. He knew he had to get over this weariness of magic, since trusting Merlin was the only way he would survive in this strange new world. After all, Merlin waited over a millenia for him, and he loved Arthur. He was definitely someone to be trusted.

Merlin was talking into the strange device, talking about this Italian pizza thing. He was so unsure in this brand new world. Everything was so different, so difficult to understand. He didn't feel like a king, he felt like someone too stupid to function in society.

Merlin suddenly said goodbye to whatever he was talking to in the mobile and put it down. He looked over at Arthur and said, "The pizza will be here soon. Someone whose job it is to deliver pizza will bring it here. In the meantime, would you like me to show you what the mobile does?"

Arthur nodded, and Merlin began to show him what this mobile thing did. He showed Arthur how to turn it on, and when he managed to do that, he gave an embarrassing shriek of delight. Merlin gave him a long, deep kiss, telling Arthur how proud he was of him that he was so accepting of this new technology. He gave Arthur a brief history of phones, but didn't overwhelm him with something long winded since Arthur was looking at the Iphone 4s. He showed him the calling first, and then the texting. "See, I texted The Doctor when I picked you up from the police station. Do you want to send someone a text?" he explained. Arthur's first text, sent to The Doctor, was _Hi, this is King Arthur of Camelot._ It was filled with typos, but Merlin still gave him a long congratulatory kiss. They were still kissing when the doorbell rang, announcing that the pizza was there. Arthur looked at Merlin with panicky eyes. "Don't worry, dollophead, that was the pizza man bringing us dinner." Arthur relaxed a little more while Merlin got the pizza, still wondering why he was here, and if he would manage to survive without going crazy. He saw Merlin come in with a large, flat box, and decided that he would survive for this gorgeous man who would wait an eternity for him.

Merlin called Arthur over. He was in a new room, filled with all kinds of appliances he didn't understand. He assumed he was in the kitchen, since Merlin was grabbing plates out of a cupboard and was putting triangular yellow things on them. Arthur walked up to him and kissed him on the mouth. "I love you," he whispered.

Arthur dragged Merlin, who was carrying the plates, over to the table. "As the king of Camelot, I demand you sit on my lap." he told Merlin. Merlin complied, and Arthur wrapped his arms around the warlock. Merlin picked up the triangular thing that Arthur assumed was pizza, and fed it into his mouth. Arthur moaned, it was the best thing he had ever tasted. He voiced his thoughts, and Merlin responded, "See, the 21st century isn't all bad. Wait till you try chocolate."

They ate the rest of their pizza while Merlin explained what all of the appliances did. He pointed to a giant silver box. "That's called a fridge. Well, one half of it is. The other half is the freezer. It keeps things cold so they don't go bad." Arthur decided to call the fridge/ freezer the snow box. "That's called the coffee pot. Every morning, it makes this amazing drink called coffee that somehow wakes me up in the mornings. That's the dishwasher. It's basically its name, so I no longer have to wash dishes by hand." The dishwasher started emitting smoke (Merlin later explained it was steam), so Arthur decided it was an evil dragon, and he would never trust it.

After the pizza was finished, Merlin went into the snow box and pulled out another box. Arthur decided that 21st century people must really like squares. Merlin then gets some bowls and starts scooping weird brown stuff into them. He put the box back into the snow box and brought the bowls over to the table. He took a spoonful of the brown stuff, which he called ice cream, and put it into Arthur's mouth. "It's cold!" Arthur exclaimed. "Well duh," Merlin responded. "It's called _ice_ cream, clotpole."

Arthur proceeded to take another bite. "It's good. I think I like it," he said. Merlin grinned and began eating his own ice cream. Arthur began shoveling the ice cream into his mouth. When it was all finished he yelped, "My head hurts! What is this sorcery?" Merlin shook his head. "You ate it too fast. Now you have a brain freeze."

Arthur still liked the taste of ice cream, but he didn't like the headache part. He decided to snog his lover, so he could taste the ice cream without the whole brain freeze thing.

(A/N: Sorry for the shitty ending. Its 1:39 am. Hope you like the cuteness.)


	4. Arthur Versus Modern Technology

Chapter 4- Arthur Versus Modern Technology

(A/N: Hey everyone, I'm back. I know it has literally been ages, and I have no excuse, but here I am, at least right? Thank you all so much for reading, you guys really help me be a better writer!)

Arthur woke up in the middle of his first night on Merlin's rather small bed, with the skinny boy's back pressed against his stomach, and his elbow poking Arthur's bladder. He had needed to pee pretty much since their dinner of that stuff that Merlin had called pizza, but after looking for a little while, he realized in this new era, he had no idea where you were supposed to go when nature called. He hadn't seen any outhouses around, nor had he seen a chamber pot in Merlin's flat. He quietly slipped out of bed and started looking around the flat, looking for anywhere. He was beginning to get a little desperate.

He walked back into the bedroom, smiling a bit when he saw Merlin asleep in the bed, his pale skin against the green of the sheets and hair ruffled from their previous evening activities. He ducked under the bed and looked for the chamber pot underneath it. Surely even a thousand years later they would still have chamber pots? What else would you do if you woke up in the middle of the night having to pee? There had to be something. The call of nature couldn't just go away after a thousand years.

He continued to grope around under the bed, but only found some old chainmail and an old cloak left over from Camelot. He made a mental note to ask Merlin what they were doing hiding under the bed. All of his rustling must have woken Merlin up, because the next thing he knew was Merlin's head dangling off the side of the bed. "What the hell are you doing?" he asked. Well. This was embarrassing. The king of Camelot had just been caught looking for the chamber pot. "I, um, I have to pee," he muttered.

Merlin giggled. "You won't find anything under there. Chamber pots haven't been used for a while now. We use these things called toilets. I'll show you," he said, leading Arthur to a door that Arthur had assumed just lead to a closet or something. He opened the door and flicked that switch that allowed light to come flooding into the room. Arthur still didn't understand how it worked, but Merlin seemed fine with it. He would just have to stay close to Merlin whenever he was anywhere near these things. He guessed that would mean all the time.

Merlin took him over to a strange looking white throne that had a hole cut in it, and the hole had water in it. They passed by a tub and some strange looking things that Arthur couldn't even begin to explain. Merlin pointed to the throne and said, "You pee in here, and then you push on this thing here," he pointed at a strange looking silvery thing, "and it all goes away. Then you come over here and you turn the water on like this," he flipped some switch thing, "and you use this soap to clean your hands. Try not to make a huge mess." Merlin left him in this strange room to relieve himself.

After finishing everything Merlin told him to do, Arthur went back into the bedroom. He saw his lover on that mobile thing, the lights making his face glow. Merlin looked up at him and his face broke out into a large grin. Arthur smiled back sheepishly as Merlin got out of bed again and wrapped his arms around him. "See, that wasn't so hard. I'm so proud of you," he whispered into Arthur's ear, and kissed him again.

Arthur sighed. His boyfriend shouldn't be proud of him because he was able to pee without making a mess. He was the king of Camelot, but he sure didn't feel like it. He felt like a simpleton who couldn't do anything by himself. Merlin noticed his distress and asked him what was wrong as they laid back down on the bed together. Merlin wrapped his arms around Arthur and the two fell asleep together.

The next morning, Arthur awoke and Merlin wasn't by his side. When the two of them had shared a bed back in Camelot, Merlin had to leave the bed before anyone else in the castle was awake in fear of being found out. Here though, Merlin was the only one who lived in the house. There was no need for him to leave before Arthur was awak. Arthur sighed, wishing that he could have awoken with the warlock in his arms.

He dragged himself out of bed and walked off to go find Merlin. He went into the room with the only fireplace in the house and found Merlin, but his boyfriend had strings coming out of his ears. Arthur couldn't begin to imagine what the strings were or what they were there for. Merlin's eyes were closed and he hadn't noticed that Arthur had come in. Arthur tried calling his boyfriend's name, but there was no response. "Merlin?" he called again, this time a little louder.

Still no response. Arthur began to feel uneasy. What were these things that caused Merlin to not even notice that Arthur had approached? "Merlin!" he yelled as if he was calling for him back in Camelot.

Still no response. Arthur didn't know what to do. Why was Merlin being so evasive? What was this strange contraption that caused Merlin to not realize he existed? Arthur smacked Merlin, gently, of course. As gentle as a medieval king could be.

Even with Arthur's kingly gentleness, Merlin's eyes shot open and he jumped at least a foot in the air. Arthur almost laughed at the reaction, but he was still terrified of the strings. "Arthur!" Merlin yelled as he pressed their lips together.

As much as he loved kissing Merlin, Arthur had to understand what was going on. Instead of wrapping his arms around him, he pulled back. "What were you doing that made you not notice me?" Arthur asked, the pain and confusion he felt showing in his eyes.

Merlin took the strings out of his ears and chuckled. "You remember my mobile, right?" he asked.

"Yeah," Arthur responded. "It's what you used to call the Italians last night, right?"

"Not exactly, but you're getting there. See, here it is," He responded, taking the mobile out of his pocket. "These," he said pointing to the strings, "are earbuds. They take music from the mobile and play them into your ears. I didn't think you would like modern music that much so I decided to use them. I'm sorry I didn't notice you."

"Why did you leave the bed?" Arthur asked.

Merlin took a deep breath before responding. "Arthur, you can't even begin to imagine how happy I am that you are back. Actually, I'm ecstatic. I'm overjoyed. But it's all still so surreal to me. I woke up and thought I was going insane, seeing you there. I just needed to leave for a little while to wrap my head around everything that has happened. I'm sorry if I worried you."

Arthur nodded, wrapping his arms around Merlin and holding him tight. He was scared. What kind of world could this possibly be for a medieval king? He didn't belong here. He belonged in Camelot, and Merlin did, too. But Camelot was long gone. They would have to make do here now. Thankfully, Arthur was better at adapting to things than his father.


End file.
